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Salon.com September 4, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Every dog has his day Mr. Blue takes his own advice and bids adieu... Neither of us has dated since we became single again. How should I invite her?... My boyfriend is Dutch and will return to Holland within the next year -- plans that don't include me... etc. |
Salon.com December 12, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
I'm so tired My husband comes to bed hours after I do and then wakes me up for sex. It's making me crazy! |
Salon.com December 5, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
All in the family My oldest brother is sleeping with a married woman, who happens to be our half-sister. Should I intervene in this perilous situation?... I really like the guy who says I'm his soul mate, but I can't go without sex for the rest of my life... etc. |
Salon.com January 2, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Season of the witch I'd like to tell my conservative Christian mother-in-law I practice Wicca. Do you think she'd understand?... etc. |
Salon.com March 13, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Final offer I'm a Christian, she's a follower of Ayn Rand. She's threatening to leave me if I continue to pursue the ministry. Is there any chance for us?... How can I knock some guy's socks off?... etc. |
Salon.com June 6, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Keeping up appearances A boy I dated in high school confessed to me he's gay, and now he wants to say I'm his girlfriend for his parents' sake. Should I play along? |
Salon.com January 17, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Say a little prayer My Christian boyfriend decided we should stop sleeping together because he wasn't sure I was "the one." Should I break it off altogether or settle for less than a whole relationship? |
Salon.com May 22, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
What's a guy to do? Snooping on my girlfriend's computer, I found a message in which she described herself as a "fun-loving lesbian." That's news to me! |
Salon.com May 8, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Long-distance love I thought the Boyfriend away in graduate school was It, but then along came the Other Man, who lives right here... |
Salon.com February 13, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
My boyfriend reminds me of my mother He's trustworthy, loving and completely dedicated to me, but lately my carnal feelings have been directed elsewhere... etc. |
Salon.com October 17, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
My wife is turning into her mother! And I'm afraid of turning to whiskey like her long-suffering father. Does that justify my affair with an old high school flame?... When do boys become men? I ask because I attend a tech-oriented university where the male-female ratio is 3-to-2, and I still can't find a man anywhere... |
Salon.com March 6, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Hey, look at me! I'm tired of playing second fiddle to my beautiful best friend who has a body like a Playboy bunny... |
Salon.com July 11, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Don't talk dirty to me Why can my 50-year-old boyfriend only speak about sex like a 12-year-old?... Is there a way to be charming and fun and even intimate while dating, without leaving a trail of broken hearts?... How do we tell a close friend that her new beau is Trouble?... etc. |
Salon.com October 10, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Almost perfect It turns out our race and age differences are nothing compared to this hurdle we must get over: He's jealous... |
Salon.com June 27, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Living dangerously The graduate student my friend is dating has the body of a porn star, but he's her professor. Should I warn him that he's risking everything he's worked for? |
Salon.com September 5, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
The one and only He's my true love, but he's married. Is there just one perfect person in the world for everyone?... I am cheap. Am I without class or just following my own drummer?... What to do about a formerly suicidal lover?... My husband wants kids but I don't... |
Salon.com October 31, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
He's gotta have it My father's addicted to Internet porn and the whole family's upset about it. What should we do?... I can't get over my affair with a younger man... Is it okay to eat a vegetable at the grocery store after it has been weighed and paid for?... My boyfriend is so obsessed with work... |
Salon.com September 19, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Leaving adolescence behind How can I live the rest of my life without that desperate-for-each-other, dangerous feeling again? |
Salon.com March 27, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Out of the past The man I'm falling for is resisting getting tested even though he has slept with junkies. Am I being too judgmental? |
Salon.com June 19, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Nouveau annoying My longtime friend married an older wealthy man and seems to have forgotten that not everyone makes six figures. Sometimes she's so insensitive I want to strangle her... etc. |
Salon.com September 26, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Gambling on love My girlfriend went to Las Vegas and cheated on me, and I can't forgive her. Should I give her another chance?... Now that I'm recovering from depression, I find I can no longer write... Money may cure a broken heart... Imagining the end of a lover's life may help ease the pain of breakup... etc. |
Salon.com August 22, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Don't call us ... Can I simply stop seeing people I don't want to be friends with, or do I have to tell them why?... |
Salon.com October 24, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Oh, grow up My girlfriend speaks in baby talk, sometimes for days at a time. Help! It's driving me nuts... |
Salon.com December 19, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Ducking the issue My married lesbian lover wants me to move with her to Europe, but she won't even consider a divorce. Should I go?... |
Salon.com November 7, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
He's 72, I'm 40. No problem He gives me money, pays my bills, flies me everywhere and swears he wants to be with me for the rest of his life -- as soon as he gets divorced... |
Salon.com July 18, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Lonely guy I'm 23 and I've never been out on a date with a girl. Is it too late for me? |
Salon.com June 26, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Kiss of death Out of nowhere, my dear friend kissed me and declared his devotion. I swear I wasn't flirting!... How do I possibly tell my girlfriend her home stinks, without insulting her and her entire family?... etc. |
Salon.com May 15, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Doing the right thing So I resisted the affair with the teeth-achingly beautiful young woman. Now I'm miserable! |
Salon.com July 24, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Late starter After years of obesity I lost 100 pounds, but women can still smell my inexperience and lack of confidence. I'm about to give up hope... etc. |
Salon.com August 15, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Don't touch me there I've tried to tell my boyfriend what I want during sex, but he can't seem to get it right. Plus, abandon my writerly dreams or take the big promotion?... Will my tired husband and I ever get back our zip?... |
Salon.com November 21, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
A walking cliche I've gone and fallen for my 19-year-old Nordic au pair. Should I tell her that I'm in love with her?... Whether or not to offer advice to a friend having an affair with a married man... etc. |
Salon.com August 1, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Enough, already My mother-in-law couldn't have been more helpful after the baby was born. She baby-sat, she cooked -- then she moved in. |
Salon.com February 27, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Lifeline My friend is too dependent on me and I can't get her to seek help for her violent mood swings. What to do? |
Salon.com September 12, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Be careful what you wish for I wanted an exciting man in my life and I got one. Trouble is, now he's got time for everyone but me... Should I still sleep with my ex?... Concerned about my aloof younger brother... It's tough being a guy who doesn't want kids... |
Salon.com July 3, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Solo blues Now that my friends are married, they seem to be allergic to socializing with an unmarried woman... For the last few years I have had a close friend with whom I have developed more than just a friendship... etc. |
Salon.com November 28, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
No place like home I love my family dearly, but do I have to spend holidays with them when they're all alcoholics, coke addicts, adulterers and screamers? |
Salon.com June 12, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
If these walls could talk I made a joke about my transgendered co-worker's looks, and I'm afraid she overheard me. I should probably fess up and apologize, but what if she didn't hear me?... Should I try to teach my fiance about the value of romantic actions?... etc. |
Salon.com February 20, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Living a lie After 20 years of marriage my wife still thinks I graduated from Harvard, and I never even finished school. How can I tell her the truth now? |
Salon.com June 20, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
He'll never break my heart I love my boyfriend but he doesn't turn me on. Should I settle for a frisson-free relationship, or hold out for what my mother calls "movie love"? |
Salon.com July 17, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Hold your tongue! My otherwise wonderful boyfriend is a lousy kisser, all sticky, sloppy, needy and undisciplined... My wife of seven years and I are happily married, or so I thought. She keeps a personal journal... etc. |
Salon.com January 23, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
With a heavy heart Mr. Blue offers advice for getting through the Bush years... Advice on midlife crises, novel-writing, marriage, etc. |
Salon.com July 25, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Getting over losing you My husband left me for the suicidal folk singer/welfare mother down the street. I know I should miss him, but I really don't. |
AskMen.com Mr. Mafioso |
The Woman's Place For better or worse, your friends and foes alike will judge you by your lady. Here are the qualities that Mr. Mafioso's woman exudes. |
Salon.com November 14, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Ugly duckling I'm witty and flirtatious on the Internet, but I can't stand the look of disappointment on the faces of the men I've charmed when I meet them... |
Salon.com July 11, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
When in doubt ... Is it practical to advise people not to get married if they feel any ambivalence at all? Are we setting a standard that's impossible to meet? |
Salon.com April 24, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
We were closer than lovers Getting dumped by my best friend was harder than any relationship breakup I've been through. And she claims it's because she fell in love with me... etc. |
Salon.com February 27, 2001 Virginia Vitzthum |
Looking for Mr. Other Half I want my soul mate to be my lover, best friend and intellectual equal. Why is that asking too much? |
Salon.com January 30, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Brief encounter Breathless kisses, talking, laughing, making out. Now she won't call me back. Help! |
Salon.com February 6, 2001 Garrison Keillor |
Too little, too late He wants to reconcile after telling me I'm too old and overweight and that he never loved me... I feel sometimes that I can't keep up with things... Now at 43 I am feeling odd for being single and childless... etc. |
Salon.com October 3, 2000 Garrison Keillor |
Ten years after My wife has never forgiven me for not being there the night she had her miscarriage... Is it socially acceptable for an out-of-shape husband to get a bellybutton ring?... Any easy tricks for a writer to use to clear her head of the monster?... etc. |